Rogue Victories – Nik Coppin

Good evening True Believers,

Yet another interesting victory as Rogue takes down Deadpool, The Invisible Woman, Bananaman and the cosmically powerful Silver Surfer. It was a right Royal Rumble of a final heat as Rik Carranza, Maxine Jones, Marc Burrows and Donald Mack did battle for their respective heroes, but Javier Jarquin stole the honours as the power-draining X-Man Rogue.

It almost came to blows as the questions came in from the audience in the interactive part of the show, but they all managed to keep a lid on it and maintain some degree of decorum and keep their super abilities in check.

I am not sure the same can be said for heat 5 however. DC’s biggest gun, Batman took the honours amid extremely questionable circumstances. It can’t be denied that Aussie comedian Justin Hamilton put forward a fantastic argument for The Caped Crusader, but many felt George Quinn’s toast-making, Clarks’ shoes-wearing, onesie-clad Superman should have edged it.

Especially given that Scot Bob Graham did nothing but trash Superman for most of the show rather than concentrate on talking up The Punisher. Something he admitted that – as a Batman fan – he was going to do before the show had even bagan! He was warned about it and told that he must put forward a balanced argument for The Punisher against DC’s two (and only real) superpowers, therefore opening what must surely be a stewards enquiry into a very loaded Batman victory.

That and Batman requested to be moved forward a day to avoid Bananaman. Yep, that’s right people Batman is a bottle job. A coward of the highest order that is scared of fruit. Hiding behind billions of dollars and his mate the equally dark and twisted Punisher. That’s no way a hero should be.

So, boys and girls, as it stands, the final has shaped up thus:

Dan De Cruz – Green Lantern

R.S. Freshpea – Judge Dredd

Ben Clover – Hulk

Andrew Roper – Rom

Justin Hamilton – Batman

Javier Jarquin – Rogue

Yes, True Believers, the final is consisting of a non-comedian, a non-superhero beat copper with anger management issues, a green sock with beads for eyes, a toy, a cowardly cheat and a plagiarist. Where are the true heroes like Spider-Man I hear you say? I know, I know. I have said the same thing. Robbed by these nefarious individuals, that’s where!

Who knows, some of the dodgy characters may yet fail to show and the true heroes may be forced to step up to the super plate. We shall see.

Catch you all on Sunday!

Make Mine Marvel!

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